4 Episodes
Aired between 30th September 1978 and 21st October 1978
Written by Douglas Adams
Produced by Graham Williams
Directed by Pennant Roberts
Synopsis
The Doctor and Romana are looking for the second segment of the key to time. Using their trusty detector, they discover that the segment is on the desolate planet of Calufrax, but when they travel there, they inexplicably find themselves on a different planet.
The TARDIS dematerialises with some difficulty, and the Doctor finds that they're in the city of a planet called Zanak. This city happens to have incredibly rare or valuable minerals just abandoned on the footpaths, a by-product of the "new golden age of prosperity" that the Captain, the city's leader declares.
The Doctor and Romana begin investigating, and soon discover that the Captain is a cyborg pirate captain that runs the planet from a large control tower known as the "Bridge" .
From this bridge, the Captain can teleport the planet across the universe and swallow other planets, mining their surfaces from within the core of Zanak. The people are mostly ignorant of this, except for a small bunch of awakened telepaths known as the Mentiads.
The Doctor and Romana try to help these telepaths stop the Captain, and in doing so, learn that the true evil on this planet isn't the Captain, but his trusty nurse, who is a projection of a former evil queen of Zanak known as Xanxia,
Finally, the heroes work with the Mentiads to stop Zanak from materialising around Earth, and convince the Captain to try and stop Xanxia. Whilst he fails and is killed by the evil queen, his sacrifice does allow the group to blow up the bridge and destroy her.
In the end, it turns out that the second segment of the Key to Time is the actual planet of Calufrax. It is recovered from being shot off into the time vortex when the bridge was destroyed, and the Doctor and Romana can go on their way.
Trivia
- Okay, let's do the most obvious. Douglas Adams is perhaps best known for Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. The story began originally as a radio play. Adams managed to sell the story to the BBC in the middle of writing this story, and worked on both things at the same time.
- This was his first involvement in the show, and his original plot was far more complicated than what was shown
- As noted in The Ribos Operation, Tom Baker had a very obvious cut on his lip from a dog bite. The scene where he bangs his lip on the console was put in to explain that. You wouldn't have known otherwise, would you?
- Something you might not know, is that following Tom Baker's failed side project to get a movie - Doctor Who and Scratchman, he actually worked on another idea with Douglas Adams. Tom loved Cricket and he was a Team Captain of a local side, and the plans were to bring the sport into the story in a big way (see all of the Fifth Doctor's episodes). This new story was to be called Doctor Who and the Krikketmen. Just as well it didn't get made
- Douglas Adams had some eccentric things that he "liked". One was a love of towels, which made it into Hitchhikers, but another was Parrots, as can be seen by the Polyphase Avitron
The Review
One of the great things about Tom Baker's run on Doctor Who is his sense of humour. The timing that Tom Baker has is impeccable, and that is an aspect that can be exploited in great ways by a comedy genius such as Douglas Adams.
The Pirate Planet is therefore a conundrum for me, because many fans love this particular story, but when I look at it, one of the only reason I can see to like it is the humour. I mentioned in the previous story that Tom had been hanging out a bit with Eric Morecambe, and the feel of that style of humour has been taken by Douglas Adams and propelled to stratospheric levels. There's nothing wrong with that, as some of the jokes and one liners are genuinely very funny, but it comes at the expense of the drama.
The premise of the story is interesting enough, with a mystery of a missing planet being presented in a unique way. But any question posed is quickly overshadowed by the relationship between the Doctor and Romana, and the obnoxious threats banded about by the Captain.
Everything here is over the top, the squabbles, the jokes, the pirate themed death threats, the robots in the shape of exotic birds. It's practically melodrama, but done in such a way that we really don't care about anyone in it. Case in point, by episode four, Douglas Adams has to resort to threatening Earth as a last desperate bid to make us feel something.
I think this story is one of the saddest ones to be made, because it has so much potential, but because of the style of the writer, characters and plot are diluted down to obvious, predictable elements that grow tiresome and irritating. I would hardly be surprised if a few immature fart gags were thrown in for good measure. Almost everyone laughs and enjoys toilet humour, but it's no good if you go into this looking for a good piece of family drama.
Rating
4 out of 10
Rewatchability Factor
3 out of 10
- The Mysterious Planet
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