The Time Warrior

Four epsidoes
Aired between 15th December 1973 and 5th January 1974

Written by Robert Holmes
Produced by Barry Letts
Directed by Alan Bromley


Synopsis

It's the 13th Century.  A robber baron called, Irongron, along with his dim-witted captain Bloodaxe are having a late night feast, cursing and vowing to take a neighbouring castle held by the weak willed Lord Edward of Wessex.

Suddenly, a great ball of light falls from the sky and crashes into the nearby forest.  Bloodaxe is terrified that it's sorcery and along with the rest of his criminal soldiers, refuse to go into the woods at night for fear of witchcraft.  Irongron curses their cowardly ways but is forced to wait until dawn to see what the ball of light is.

Sure enough, at dawn, Irongron, Bloodaxe and his men ride out into the forest.  They come across a crashed spaceship that is spherical.  A door opens from its side and a squat, stocky figure emerges, clad in "space armour".  The figure is Commander Linx, a Sontaran warrior who has been shot down during a reconnaissance mission.  He claims the planet for the Sontaran Empire and looks at the prospects of repairing his ship.

He soon works out that Irongron and his cronies are too primitive to help him, but he strikes a deal.  Linx agrees to provide Irongron with weapons from the stars to capture any castle if Irongron in turn allows Linx to stay in his castle to repair his ship and provide some men for menial labour.   Irongron agrees.

Back in the 20th Century,  the Doctor is summoned to a country house by UNIT.  when he arrives, he sees a load of scientists and soldiers hanging around.  He asks the Brigadier what's going on and the Brigadier tells him a load of leading boffins are being kidnapped.  UNIT has been tasked with keeping the rest of them safe.  The Brigadier thought the best way of doing that was to put all his eggs in one basket and keep them under lock and key at this country house.  He asks the Doctor to remain present and try to get to the bottom of who's kidnapping scientists.

As the Doctor gets his TARDIS shipped in, he meets an equally eccentric and extremely short sighted scientist called Professor Rubeish.

He also meets a young woman who claims to be Lavinia Smith, a reknown scientist.  This intrigues the Doctor as he's read some of Lavinia's work and knows that the girls age doesn't add up.  She confesses to being Sarah Jane Smith. Lavinia is her aunt and she's a journalist.  She used Lavinia's credentials (whilst her aunt is away in America) to infiltrate this country house on the hunt for an answer to the missing scientists.  With a glint in his eye, the Doctor agrees not to give Sarah away, and gets on with his work.

Later that evening, Rubeish also become suspicious of Sarah, but the Doctor throws him off the scent to keep her secret.  Sarah visits the Doctor as he's working on a device, getting him to explain to her that it scans for delta particles and gives an alarm, waking him up.  She obviously doesn't understand it and goes to bed.

In the middle of the night, the scanner goes off, alerting the Doctor and Sarah Jane.  He grabs a special flashlight and wanders around the complex when he finds that Professor Rubeish has been taken from under his nose.  The flashlight picks up the spectral image of Linx on the stairway before he disappears.

The Brigadier turns up just as the Doctor is about to rush into the TARDIS. The Doctor quickly explains that the kidnapper is using a weak powered time travel device, pulling them back through time.

As the Doctor explains, Sarah Jane stows onboard the TARDIS.  The Doctor rushes off and locks onto the signal, travelling back in time to the middle ages, just outside Irongron's castle.  As he wanders off to explore, Sarah Jane comes out of the TARDIS, bemused at the dimensions of the blue box.

It turns out that Linx has been very busy in a short time.  He's been using a device called an Osmic Projector to go forward in time and kidnap more capable people with the technical knowhow to repair his ship.  Whilst he's at it, he's also been bringing back breech loading rifles for Irongron's forces to use.  Irongron is very happy with the "star weapons" and can finally see a way of defeating the Lord of Wessex.

Elsewhere, Lord Edward and his lady are despairing at Irongron.  They have very few men, as King Richard has taken them all to fight in the crusades.  He's sent a runner out to ask other nearby lords to pool their soldiers to fight the robber-barron but that takes time.  The wily Lady comes up with a plan to assassinate Irongron as he's looking over the castle ramparts, something he does every morning.  They send their best archer - Hal to see to it.

As predicted, Hal sees Irongron taking a walk on the ramparts in the morning.  He's about to fire when Sarah Jane taps him on the shoulder and asks where she is.  She startles Hal and the shot goes wide, alerting Irongron.

Hal flees but, still believing she's in the 20th Century, Sarah Jane mistakes all these castles and smelly men for reinactors.  She fights and struggles as one of Irongron's  soldiers takes her into the castle.

The Doctor meanwhile, oblivious to Sarah's predicament, sneaks into Irongrons castle and sees Linx, confirming that a Sontaran is behind it all.

Sarah Jane is taken before Irongron who laughs at her weird manner as she rants at being manhandled.

She eventually gets the point that they're not reinactors or cosplayers, when Hal the Archer is captured.  Irongron tells bloodaxe to take him away and execute him.  Linx turns up with a robot knight he's made for Irongron and hypnotises Sarah, getting her to talk of the Doctor and how she came here.  Linx is worried but Irongron laughs it off.  He's keen to see the robot in action, so he takes it to the courtyard.

Once there, he stops Bloodaxe and equips Hal with his bow, telling him to fight the knight.

Everyone is stunned when the knight takes three arrows to the chest and still keeps advancing on the archer.

The Doctor is up on the battlements and sneaks one of the guards crossbows, shooting the control out of Irongron's hands.  The Knight goes bezerk and attacks Irongron, allowing Sarah Jane and Hal to escape.

Together, they go to Wessex castle and tell Lord Edward what's happened.  Sarah didn't see the crosbow shot, and has become convinced that the Doctor is in league with Linx, abducting people from the present and taking them to the past.  She convinces Lord Edward to send a commando raid back to Irongron's castle to capture the Doctor.  Sarah and Hal are part of it.

Meanwhile, the Doctor continues skulking around the castle, eventually finding Linx's room where all the scientists are there, brainwashed and doing manual labour.  He's found by Linx whom he tries to convince to stop.

Linx is aware of the Time Lords and their home world Gallifrey, and he doesn't see the need to stop at all.  He takes the Doctor prisoner, believing his repairs will be far more efficient with a Time Lord working for him.  He placed the Doctor on a machine that gives him an electric shock when he doesn't do his work and leaves.

Professor Rubeish finds the Doctor after he's been shocked a couple of times .  Rubeish hasn't been affected by the mind control ray because he's as blind as a bat without his glasses.  He frees the Doctor and agrees to keep an eye out for him.

Now free, the Doctor leaves to find Sarah, but runs into Bloodaxe and Irongron who are coming to find Linx.  He flees into the courtyard and is forced to take on multiple bandits before Irongron raises his sword, preparing to strike the killing blow.

Once again, the blade is shot out of Irongron's hand, this time by Hal the Archer.

The Doctor races up to the battlements again, setting fire to some hay to block the corridor as he goes.

His thanks to Sarah are short lived as she orders Lord Edwards men to take the Doctor captive.  Together, they flee back to Wessex Castle.  When they get there, Lord Edward and the Lady Wessex agree to let the Doctor live if he agrees to use his sorcery against Irongron.  The Doctor points out that he was never on Irongron's side and he's more than willing to help them.

Getting fed up of all these raids, Irongron decides to use Linx's star weapons to assault Wessex castle, especially as he knows it's lightly defended.  When Linx learns of the planned attack, he practically jumps for joy and asks to come along to watch the battle - Sontarans love war.

Over at Wessex castle, the Doctor and Sarah Jane work on primitive stink bombs and put dummies up on the ramparts.  He explains the fact that he's a time lord and can travel anywhere in space and time, a fact that Sarah Jane is astonished by, but certainly believes.

The morning comes and Irongrons men arrive.  They are flummoxed by the vast number of men on the ramparts until Linx takes one of the rifles and demostrates that they are just dummies.

Irongron orders the men to scale the walls, but as they climb the ladders, they're assaulted by the stink bombs and driven off into the woods again, believing it sorcery.

When they get back to the castle, Irongron tries to blame his men for the failure, but Linx is contemptable towards the baron.

He easily beats Irongron to the ground when he challenges him and threatens him not to interfere with the Sontaran's work or challenge him again.

Lord Edward and Lady Wessex celebrate, but the Doctor says it's only a temporary victory.

They need to sort out Irongron once and for all, and more importantly, stop Linx.  He comes up with a plan to sneak back into Irongron's castle and put them to sleep with a potion, then they can disarm them and tie them up.  Together, he and Sarah set off on the plan.

They enter the castle as monks and quickly set the plan up.

They go first to Linx's lab, where they see the scientists beginning to collapse from exhaustion and starvation.  He tries to take them out of hypnosis but is interrupted when Linx returns. He offers to help Linx leave the planet if he'll just get rid of the scientists.  Linx refuses and shoots the Doctor.  Luckily, Sarah Jane jumps at Linx and stops the shot.  Linx bats her aside and prepares to fire again, but is knocked unconscious when the Doctor subtly directs Rubeish to smash the Sontaran on the probic vent at the back of his neck.

They begin to tie Linx up and the Doctor sends Sarah off to the kitchens to spike the meal with a sleeping potion whilst he tries to bring the scientists out of hypnosis.  He's interrupted once again with Bloodaxe demanding that Linx goes to the main hall.

Sarah gets to the kitchen but is caught by one of the women slaves, who believes her to be a peasent  She allows Sarah to stay but forces her to work by making the meal.

Once up and running, the Doctor leaves Rubeish to send everyone back to the present using the Osmic Projector whilst he slows Irongron down.  He dons the robot knight outfit and goes to the main hall, trying to pass himself off as the robot and tells Irongron that Linx sent him.  Irongron decides to test the robot's abilities again, and begins fighting "it".

The Doctor bests Irongron but is forced to fight him and Bloodaxe.  He ultimately reveals himself when they threaten to smash the robots head off.  He's captured.

Irongron goes to the lab and unties a now recovered Linx.  He tells Linx of the Doctor's capture and brings him to the great hall.  Now out of his armour, the Doctor is forced to stand at one end of the room whilst Irongron lines up four of his men with rifles at the other end.  They all fire, trying to hit the Doctor but their aim is terrible and the Doctor dodges very well.

Luckily, Sarah uses the clattering noises upstairs as a chance to spike the meal anyway and sneak out whilst everyone is distracted.  She goes upstairs and swings a chandalier to the Doctor who uses it to sweep past the men and lock the door to the hall, thus allowing him to get Sarah and escape.

They go back to Lord Edward and give it time for the potion to take effect.

Back down in Irongron's castle, Linx announces that he's almost ready to leave.  Irongron challenges him again, saying he can go when Irongron allows it.

Linx warns him not to stop him and he walks off, leaving Irongron and his men to eat and drink their meals.

The Doctor, Sarah and this time Hal the archer go back to the castle.  The Doctor brings with him a metal fan from the TARDIS.  He sets Hal on with collecting all of the men's weapons whilst he finishes sending the scientists back.

Sure enough, the Doctor gets to the lab and finds the last handful left to die whilst the Sontaran ship re-charges for the flight.  With Sarah to help, they begin to send the last of the scientists through as Linx arrives to enter his ship.  The Doctor tells Sarah to carry on the process whilst he keeps Linx busy.

When Hal gets to the main chamber, he's stopped by a drowsy Irongron, who believes Linx has betrayed him.  He staggers off towards the lab.

Linx tries to shoot the Doctor, but his guns bream is reflected by the metal fan.

He opts instead for hand to hand combat, but didn't count on the Doctor's Venusian Akido.  Regardless of this, the Doctor is beaten up until Sarah sends Professor Rubeish back and goes to help him.  At that point, Irongron staggers inside and challenges Linx, and is promptly shot to death.  Luckily for Sarah, Linx doesn't see the female as a threat, so goes into his ship and begins the take off procedure.

Hal the Archer recovers to the sound of the ship powering up.  He wakes Bloodaxe and tells him to get his men out of the castle.  Bloodaxe and the rest flee whilst Hal races to the lab.  He enters just as the Sontaran is closing the door to his ship.  He quickly fires an arrow, hitting Linx directly in the probic vent, killing him instantly.

The Doctor recovers and says that the ship is going to self destruct.  Together, they race out of the castle as it is destroyed in the blast.

They thank Hal, and both go to leave.  Hal says that the Doctor is "truly a great magician".  The Doctor smiles and says he's not one at all, but Sarah quips "I'm not so sure about that".

Trivia

As they were filming The Green Death, they got hold of Lis Sladen.  She auditioned normally, and was in no way head hunted, but Barry Letts seemed to see something in her that none of the other hopefuls gave.  He introduced her to Jon Pertwee without her knowing that she'd even be a long term companion, and Jon gave the thumbs up behind her back.  She was to be a worthy replacement for Katy Manning.

This was especially good, considering that it was around this time that the crew heard of Roger Delgado's death.  Jon was feeling very down, especially considering that Katy was as close to him as anyone and she was moving on.  Likewise, Barry and Terrence were just beginning to film their pilot for Moonbase 3, so didn't have a lot of time for Doctor Who.

Robert Holmes wasn't a happy soul either.  He'd never wanted to do a historical piece.  He got annoyed enough by ten year old anorak types pointing out plot holes in his stories, he didn't need ten year olds and historical boffins doing the same!  Regardless of this, Terence Dicks was adamant he wanted a historical story, and heavily convinced Holmes to do it.

It came to filming and Barry was anxious (or curious) about how Alan Bromley was going to handle the special effects such as the destruction of the castle, and the flight of the spaceship.  They'd done a magnificent job of blowing up the church on the Daemons, so Barry wanted to give Bromley some advice.  The veteren director however reassured him that everything was in hand.  What noone thought of however. was Alan Bromley liked the simplest was possible to do anything.  Why go overbudget when a tenis ball on a string would do the trick?  The end result was literally what we got.  The castle explosion was actually stock footage of a detonation in a quarry.

What worked?

• It's got to be said, Irongron's dialogue is just magical!

• It's nice to see the Third Doctor being jovial and sarcastic for a change

• The look of Linx is also great.  For some unknown reason, it goes steadily worse over the next few Sontaran stories

• In fact, most of the acting in this is exceptional

• You can tell that this story has been thought through.  There's a good explanation for why the Sontaran's are like they are, and why they have a probic vent on their neck

• The bit where Rubeish says it's his strong will that stopped him being hypnotized - classic!

What didn't work?

• The special effects

• The robot knight

• Sarah's feminist rant in the kitchen - surely she knows it's likely to get her killed

• All the in and out of the lab and Irongron's castle all the time

Overall Feelings
This story is the stuff that great Doctor Who comprises of.  It's not original, after all, The Time Meddler is all about an alien that provides futuristic weapons to the middle ages.  But it does it in an interesting way with interesting characters.

Irongron is brought to life by David Daker, to the point where we can see that he's playground-bullied his way through life to get what he's got - we can imagine how things were long before we came into the picture, with Bloodaxe hanging stupidly on his every word.  Instead of a bumbling carry-on villain doing things because it's fun, we get a mighty warrior from the stars who's race and customs are well thought through.

Even Sarah Jane Smith's entrance is a refreshing one, with her being more proactive than Jo ever was, and her reactions, although drawn out a little bit too long, are most likely the reactions that many of us would have to suddenly finding everyone in Robin Hood gettup.

Stellar cast, brill acting, fantastic costumes.  This is what the BBC was great at and they delivered it well here.  So why isn't it a 10?  Because it's personally, a little bit tedious in places.  The Japes are funny, but with Rubeish it's non-stop.  If I had to hear Irongron call Linx a Toad one more time, I'd have thrown something at the TV, and then there's the obligatory feminist rant towards women whom she's trying to remain inconspicuous with.

Rating

9 3/4 out of 10

Rewatchability Factor

7 out of 10

Watch this if you liked...

• The Time Meddler
• The Sontaran Experiment
• The Invasion of Time
• The Two Doctors
• The Sontaran Strategem (Doctor Who, Series 4)
• The Poison Sky (Doctor Who, Series 4)

Consulting the Matrix
So, do you think the female slaves ever got out of the castle before it blew up?

The Green Death

Six episodes
Aired between 19th May 1973 and 23rd June 1973

Written by Robert Sloman
Produced by Barry Letts
Directed by Michael Bryant


Synopsis

In Llanfairfach, Wales, a miner races through the underground tunnels of the Llanfairfach mine, a place deserted for over a year thanks to the Governments decision to close the pit in favour of a new chemical company - Global Chemicals.  The miner is panicking as he's been infected with a strange green substance that glows and throbs across this skin.

On the surface, some kind of protest is going on, held by the former miners.  They are addressed by Steven's, a bureaucratic man in a suit and tie who claims to be the Chief Executive of Global Chemicals.  He consoles the miners for the loss of their jobs, but he says he's invented a process to revolutionise the use of fuel across the globe.  His words seem to have some affect on the ex miners, but Steven's is heckled from another group of protesters, a bunch of hippy scientists, led by Doctor Clifford Jones.

The workers turn on Jones and his band of peace lovers, but before they can begin to argue, the emergency whistle blows from the closed pit, drawing them all in.  Needless to say, the strikers turn up to see the miner dead at the top of the pit shaft, his hand, resting on the cord of the whistle, is somehow infected and coated in a throbbing luminous green substance.

Over at UNIT HQ, Jo becomes aware of Global Chemcial's intent to take over the pit, and of Dr Jones' crusade to stop them when she reads the morning paper.  She tries to tell the Doctor about the situation, but he's more interested in hardwiring the coordinates to Metabilis III into the TARDIS so he can take Jo there.

They both talk at cross purposes, and the Doctor looks a little bit hurt when Jo refuses to go with him.  She says she intends to go on down to Llanfairfach and help Dr Jones even if she has to resign from UNIT to do it.

As Jo packs, the Brigadier shows up and tries to convince the Doctor to go down to Llanfairfach and look into the mysterious death of the poor miner.  The Doctor is adamant that he's going to Metabilis III with or without Jo.  Speak of the Devil, Jo turns back up and goes off on one at the Brigadier, making it quite clear that like it or not, Jo is off to Llanfairfach.  The Brigadier huffs and tells her he's going down their anyway so he'll give her a lift, but rather than investigate Global Chemicals, he has orders to protect them.  Jo dislikes the situation, but readily accepts the Brigadiers invitation for a lift down.

As they leave, the Doctor reflects silently to himself, then smiles and proclaims that the fledgling flies the coop.  He gets into the TARDIS and goes off on his adventure.  He arrives on the blue-planet of Metabilis III and exits the TARDIS, expecting it to be the fantastic place that he's always told Jo it was.  Unfortunately, within seconds of leaving his machine, the Doctor is grabbed by a rather large tentacle and dragged away.

After asking a very Welsh milkman for directions, the Brigadier drops Jo off at Dr Jones' "Nuthutch"as promised.  He then goes to meet with Mr Stevens at Global Chemicals.  Stevens is arrogant, but is uncomfortable at the Brigadier;s insistence to investigate the miner's death.

As the Brigadier leaves, he tells his henchman, Hinks, to make sure no one goes down the mine.

Back on Metabilis III, the Doctor gets free of the tentacles and is forced to avoid a giant snake, climbing a rocky mountain to do so.  He's dive-bombed by a giant bird, but he manages to retrieve a blue sapphire, form the birds nest.

Meanwhile, Jo is welcomed by the commune and shown into the main study room.  She finds Clifford Jones but he's very patronising towards her, especially when she's shown to be very clumsy .He tells her all about the nuthuch, and how his friend, Nancy, is developing a special fungus that will hopefully replace the need for meat - Saliota Orbis (a lot like Quorn).

Jo has a chat with Dr Jones about the work of Global Chemicals and he tells her that they're claiming to have a revolutionary new process to make oil more efficient, but Jones claims that it's still using up natural resources, and creating pollution and waste product that won't break down easily, compared to say wind turbines or solar power.  Having said that, Global Chemicals claim not to have any waste, but Jones isn't convinced, in fact, he reckons it's got something to do with the miners death.   Jo concludes that Global chemicals might be pumping the waste down the disused mine.  Dr Jones agrees, but doesn't understand that when she suggests going to look, she means right this second.  He patronisingly dismisses the notion, saying he's got work to do, so she goes off on her own.

The Brigadier meanwhile, like Dr Jones, is suspicious of Global Chemicals' claim of zero waste.  He intends to go down the mine and investigate, but would prefer the Doctor with him.  He calls UNIT HQ numerous times to see if the Doctor is there.

On Metabilis III, the Doctor manages to flee back to the TARDIS, evading some kind of primitives who hurl spears at him.  He takes off and materialises back in UNIT HQ where he stumbles out of the TARDIS, tattered and torn, and picks up the phone, exclaiming "I'll speak to anyone!" when the operator asks if he'll accept the call.   Within minutes, the Doctor takes off in Bessie towards Llanfairfach.

Elsewhere in the village, Dai Evens, one of the former miners talks with his friends and convinces them to operate the lift and send him down the mine to find out what happened to their friend to cause his skin to go green.  He's been exploring the mine for a little while when Jo turns up.  At that point, he uses the emergency phone to ring the top of the lift shaft and asks for help - he too is glowing bright green.  The other miners prepare to go down, and Jo insists on going with them as she's trained in first aid.  Reluctantly, one of the miners called Bert decides to go with them, leaving the other at the top to operate the lift.

Back at Global Chemicals, one of the managers confronts Stevens about the deaths related to the mine, and says he wants to come clean about Global Chemical's responsibility.  It's revealed that Stevens isn't in charge of Global Chemicals anymore, it's someone called the BOSS.  The manager is restrained and brainwashed.

The Doctor and Brigadier discuss the problem as they drive Bessie up to the old mine.  The Doctor says it's important not to let anyone into the mine until he's had a chance to look himself, but they arrive to see the lift wheel spinning, indicating that someone's going down.  They rush in to find that Dai Evans is down in the mine injured and Jo and Bert have gone down to help him,  The Doctor insists that he stops the lift immediately, which the miner tries, but it doesn't work - the lift is out of control!

Thinking fast, the Doctor jams the wheel with a pit prop and stops the lift, but renders it inoperable for a time.

Jo and Bert survive the jerk of the lift, and find they're still 20ft from the bottom of the shaft.  They use a rope to climb the rest of the way.  They see Dai Evans, but he's virtually covered in the glowing green infection.  They move off deeper into the mine to find the cause and hopefully, a way out.

After the Doctor finds a removed bolt to be the initial cause of the break failure, the miner at the top of the shaft says that they need cutting equipment to free the cables.  Not to fear though, Global Chemicals are supposed to have some cutting gear, they just need to ask them.

The Brigadier goes to see Global Chemicals, but Stevens and the brainwashed manager there say they don't have any and summarily dismisses the Brigadier.  Elgin, one of the managers at Global Chemicals is appalled at the conversation, as he's sure they do have some.  He talks to the brainwashed manager, but stays silently frustrated when the manager tows the party line.

Dr Jones discovers that Jo has gone down the mine and offers a hand to help.

Frustrated at Global Chemicals response, the miner is adamant that they do have cutting equipment, because he knows where they put it.  The Doctor decides to sneak into the place, with the help of Dr Jones and his hippy friends causing a distraction.  He jumps the fence with the help of a mobile lift.

The Doctor is soon identified on CCTV and the henchman - Hinks tries to intimidate the Doctor.  He underestimates the Doctor however and gets knocked out along with a number of other guards with a good demonstration of Venusian Akido.  He flees when other guards, armed with guns turn up, and is caught in a trap, and imprisoned.  Stevens comes to visit him and insists they don't have any cutting gear.  He takes him to the place where it should be and it's indeed empty.  Showing a kind side, Stevens agrees to overlook the incident but warns the Doctor not to come back.

The Doctor gets back to the mine head just in time to discover that the Brigadier has had more luck, finding some cutting equipment at a local garage.  They frantically begin to repair the lift.

Down in the mine, Bert and Jo find a pool of glowing green liquid.  Bert is stupid enough to touch it and soon contracts the Green Death.  They go on a little while, but Bert's condition is getting worse, forcing him to stay in the mine and urging her to go on and get help.

The Doctor finally enters the mine to find Dai Evans is dead.  He races through the tunnels until he finds Bert, very ill, and Jo a short way ahead, looking upon a vast lake of green slime infested with giant maggots.

The tunnel behind them caves in, revealing more maggots with canine-like jaws, and they're forced to go ahead, making it across the lake by sailing in a mine cart using pit props as paddles.

The Doctor retrieves one of the giant maggot eggs and they continue on their search for a way out.

They eventually come across some pipes that lead up to Global Chemicals and have to race against time as they can hear another torrent of slime coming down the tubes.  Luckily for them, Elgin was in the pump room, trying to convince the brainwashed manager that something's going on in the company.  Elgin frees them from the pipe just in time and smuggles them out of the complex.

The Doctor goes and tells the Brigadier about everything and they confront Stevens with evidence of giant maggots in the mine and waste product.  Stevens in turn is quite calm and claims that he's got protection from Whitehall, going so far as to call the Minister of Ecology to give the Brigadier a direct order to cooperate with Global Chemicals.  He's even rebuked by the Prime Minister when he tries to argue back.  Once again ,the Brigadier is sent packing.  Afterwards, Stevens tells Hinks that the giant maggot egg is a problem and it must be dealt with.

With little else to do, the Brigadier, the Doctor and Jo spend the evening having a meal at the Nuthutch, trying out Nancy's Quorn.  They hear that Bert has unfortunately died, as there doesn't seem to be a cure for the Green Death.  The only lead they have is the giant maggot egg, which the Doctor intends to investigate the following day.  Each of them retire, and Dr Jones has a bit of a tender moment with Jo by the fireside, being interrupted by the Doctor and sent off to his own room.

Jo smiles and reads a book on the Amazon that Dr Jones gave her, just as Hinks sneaks into the building from the patio behind her, gun in hand.  Luckily, the heat from the fire must have speeded up the hatching process and a giant maggot bursts out of the egg, attacking hinks and wounding him.

As Jo screams, the maggot slithers off out of the patio door into the darkness, leaving only a trail of green slime left to analyse.

The following day, the Brigadier is ordered to blow up the mine, sealing the tunnels and moving all UNIT soldiers away from the area.  The Doctor asks the Brigadier to give him time, and he goes to see Stevens, begging him to allow an investigation first, because the maggots are contained in one place.  Stevens vindictively ignores the Doctor and says someone from Government office has come to help him do what needs to be done - it turns out it's Captain Yates undercover!

The Doctor protests with "Mr" Yates, but even he denies the Doctor's request and sends him packing, forcing the Brigadier to blow up the mine.  Not long afterwards, the maggots are forced to crawl to the surface and are now menacing anyone near the mines slag heaps.

The Brigadier regroups and talks to the Doctor, explaining that he sent Captain Yates in to get the inside story.  They call Yates up to try and get an update, but it becomes apparent that he's watched over 24/7.  They have no alternative but to try and get inside the complex again and find out what's going on.  The problem is, how do they do that?  The Doctor comes up with an idea that is worthy of a drunken dare.  He disguises himself as a welsh milkman and bluffs his way past the entry guard!

 Not only that, when the security cameras pick him up snooping around, he pops into a cleaners cupboard and puts on an apron and hat, pretending to be a woman!

The Doctor goes around cleaning the place until he spots "mr" Yates going towards a lift.  He writes on the window in the cleaning fluid to get rid of his guard.  Yates tricks his guard into getting on the elevator, but he then darts out at the last moment, claiming he's left a briefcase.

The Doctor and Yates go to his office where Yates tells him that it's clear Stevens is taking orders from someone upstairs, quite literally on the top floor.

Stevens turns up and Yates picks up his case, looking sheepish as he goes off again with the guard.

Over at the nuthutch, Jo is beginning to get in the way again as she's trying to be helpful.  She accidentally knocks over some of Nancy's Quorn onto the samples of slime whilst Cliff is examining them.  Dr Jones is far too engrossed to see that she's desperate to help.  She's so desperate in fact that she writes him a note and goes off with a cat carrier to try and capture a maggot.

The Doctor, now free to roam, quickly changes back into his normal clothes and uses his sonic screwdriver to get into the elevator and ride it to the top floor.  He enters a room full of electronic machinery as a booming voice says that he's been expected.  It turns out that the boss of Global Chemicals really IS a BOSS - Biomorphic Organisational Systems Supervisor.  In other words, the supercomputer is alive and controlling staff at Global Chemicals.

Through conversation, the Doctor gets BOSS to reveal that it's sentient and has human illogical thought processes.  It came up with the new chemical processing and intends to use that process to change the way the world uses fuel - effectively making everyone dependent upon Global Chemicals and taking over the world like only an evil corporation can.  The Doctor, seeing that BOSS likes to think of itself as a know-it-all, gives the computer a riddle that's an unsolvable paradox and uses the distraction to escape.  Unfortunately, the lift is already occupied by Stevens and a couple of guards.

They take the Doctor back to BOSS and put a mind control headset on him.  The mind control doesn't work, and the guards are ordered to keep him prisoner.

He's locked up but it's not long before Mike Yates comes and rescues him.  They both try to flee the compound, but Mike is captured and the Doctor is forced to leave him behind, escaping in a milk float!

Captain Yates is taken to BOSS and this time, the mind control works.  He's sent with a gun to kill the Doctor.  It's only by using the blue crystal he procured on Metabilis III that the Doctor is able to break the conditioning and stop Yates from firing the gun.

They send Mike back, asking him to bluff that he's killed the Doctor.

Meanwhile, Dr Jones realises that the Quorn is an antidote for the Green Death, but he finds Jo's note and rushes off to stop her getting into danger.

The Brigadier however has other problems.  He's got hundreds of giant maggots roaming the area and they're bullet proof too!

To try and solve the problem, he orders and air strike from a helicopter.  All this is unknown to Jo who sneaks past Sgt Benton onto the slag heap, looking for maggots.  Cliff turns up slightly later and the oblivious Sgt Benton says he sent her home when he found her here.  Cliff sees Jo way up on the slag heap and also goes up there, as Sgt Benton goes off to shout at his men.

The helicopter arrives and the pilots start dropping HE grenades all around the place.  Cliff and Jo flee into an old pit entrance, but the bombs knock him unconscious.

Captain Yates makes it back to Global Chemcials and reports that the Doctor is dead, but the wily Steven's smells a rat but congratulates Yates and leaves him on guard with a freshly brainwashed Elgin.  Once alone, Yates uses the Doctor's blue saphire to break Elgin's hypnosis and discovers that BOSS has something big planned for 4pm that day.  Unfortunately, Stevens turns up again and discovers that Yates is no longer under hypnosis.

Back on the slag heap, things are looking bad.  The bombing run did nothing to the maggots, and Sgt Benton even finds an empty chrysalis casing from one of the maggots, indicating that a giant fly is buzzing about somewhere.

Jo gets in touch with Sgt Benton through a busted up radio and he takes some soldiers up with the Doctor to rescue them.  The Doctor uses some ultra-high frequency pulse from his sonic screwdriver to stun the maggots around them and they flee back to the nuthutch.

Once back at the hutch, it becomes clear that Cliff has been infected and it's a race against time before he dies of the Green death.

In a fever, Cliff mentions the word serendipidy, but the Doctor is puzzled by what he's referring to.  He takes over Cliff's research but because he doesn't know about the Quorn, has to start all over again.

It's not until Nancy cooks a joint of Quorn (don't ask), that the hatched maggot shows up again, eats a bit and dies.  This gives the Doctor the revelation about serendipidy and with Jo's help, he's able to locate the Quorn powder.

He turns some into a solution to give Cliff an injection of it and save his life, then Sgt Benton and the Doctor drive around the slag heap, throwing handfuls of Quorn to the maggots who all taste it and die.   On their way, they're attacked by a stop motion dragonfly, but the Doctor throws his cape up into the air and the dragon fly hits it at full speed, presumably killing itself.

Yates manages to break his imprisonment and rushes to tell the Doctor and the Brigadier that something big is going to happen at 4pm.

Just as Yates said, something IS going to happen.  With Stevens' aid, BOSS is going to link up with other computers around the world and force a corporate takeover.  The UNIT team go to Global Chemicals but the armed security guard won't let them in.  Luckily the link up scrambles all mind-controlled personnel so the Doctor can run past him and into the complex.

He gets to the BOSS and uses the Metabilis Saphire to break Stevens' conditioning.

Stevens sets the place to self destruct and tells the Doctor to get out, which he does.  The place blows up, killing BOSS and Stevens, ending the threat.

With victory in hand, the UNIT troops all gather at the nuthutch for a celebration.  Jo takes the Docotr to one side and explains that the freshly recovered Dr Jones has asked her to stay with him and go up the Amazon river, looking for a fabled mushroom that could answer the worlds food crisis.  The Doctor seems a tad disappointed but knows it means a lot to her so he gives her his blessing.  This is made all the more prominent when it turns out that Cliff proposes to Jo and they are to be married too.

One final surprise comes when the Brigadier announces that the nuthutch has been made an official research centre for alternative food sources.  The Doctor smiles and accuses Jo of using her uncle in the UN to pull some strings.  She smiles back and says it's only the second time she's asked him for anything.

The Doctor gives Jo the Metabilis Saphire as a wedding gift.

When all the UNIT personnel join with the hippy's to sing "he's a jolly good fellow" to Cliff, the Doctor somberly drinks his champagne and leaves, riding back to UNIT HQ alone.

Trivia

• For those of you who didn't know, Barry Letts was something of a Bhuddist.  In 1973 he was beginning to despair at the state of the world in terms of global pollution and ecological ruin and decided to use his platform to contribute to the conversation.  That's why he commissioned this

• He chose Robert Sloman to write it, knowing that he was capable, but more importantly, because he knew Sloman would get on with it and not pester him or Terrence Dicks whilst they prepared Moonbase 3, their new show

• Interestingly, this is the last story until 1996 to feature the Doctor Who text in the Jon Pertwee Logo.  From then on, it would be the de-facto font for all Doctor Who media releases.  

• Similarly, this is the last story until the end of the classic era to use the words "Episode" . From this point on, everything will be in "Parts" (except Destiny of the Daleks).

• As mentioned in Frontier in Space, Katy Manning had wanted to move on.  This meant that after three years on set, Katy got to have what many companions didn't.  She got to have a planned send off.  It's something of a shame, but Katy Manning didn't return to the screen of Doctor Who for 37 years but did appear in one final episode in 2010, and has been incredibly active on the convention circuit for years and years.  She is even heavily involved with Big Finish audio, to the point where she has a spin off character who's like a time lord and has a pet Panda (*sigh*)  Oh and I almost forgot, she would later cause much controversy when she posed naked with a Dalek for a magazine shoot.

• At the time of shooting, Stewart Bevan (Dr Cliff Jones) was Katy Manning's real life boyfriend

• The guy who played Elgin became seriously ill during filming and was hospitalised.  Therefore, Roy Skelton had to take up the mantle in episode 5

What worked

• The maggots creep everyone out, so very good as monsters

• The ending is very poignant and really well done

• As with the Drashigs, the maggots jaws look quite realistic and therefore scary

• The Metabilis III scenes were a nice change of pace and can't help but be funny

• Likewise, the BOSS is the weirdest computer ever seen and it's so close to human that it can't help but be funny, especially when it's humming classical music

• Sgt Benton throwing Quorn to maggots like he was feeding animals and saying here kitty kitty was also quite memorable

What didn't work

So many things.  Let's see...

• Killing monsters by Quorn

• The giant bird feet on Metabilis III

• The stereotypical welsh people

• Dr Jones' patronising manner

• The scene where the maggots are stunned by the doctor- you can see floorboards where the operators hid under to work the maggots!

• The plan to skulk around global Chemicals via milk float and cleaning uniform

• The milk float escape

• The stop-motion dragonfly

Overall Feelings

So this is Jo Grant's great send off.  I'll be open and upfront with you now, probably alienating at least a hundred classic Doctor Who fans.  I don't like it.

It's not so much the crazy amount of stereotyping of the Welsh.  I'm from Yorkshire, so I'm more than used to lazy assumptions of flat caps, whippets, and "trouble et Mill", so I think are the Welsh with people ending most phrases with a question or "Boyo" and all being called Jones.  The thing that gets me about it is that even the star of the show is sending up the Welsh, doing something more akin to Benny Hill than infiltrating a very dangerous corporation. Funny as it maybe, it's a bit out of kilter with what Barry Letts wanted.

In addition to this, even if you put aside the "blink and you'll miss it" courtship between Cliff and Jo, I can't get past Cliff's attitude towards her, Even though the Doctor has been patronising in the past, and of course, the Second Doctor's insistence that Polly put the kettle on, this really does take the biscuit, even more so when you think that Sarah Jane Smith is in the very next story - can you imagine her response to Cliff's put downs and assumption that they're going to get married?  Also, considering the production team had some warning that Katy was leaving, they still made it look very rushed.

finally, there isn't one plot, there's two.  That's not a problem except for the fact that we're asked to treat it as one.  The first plot is about a maniacal computer trying to take over the world, the second is about giant maggots terrorising Wales.  My issue with it is that BOSS never even concerns himself with the maggots.  They're not on its radar at all.  Then, in the last ten minutes of the story, he says he's going to link up with computers over the world and take over.  It feels disconnected in the way it's written.

"But,,," I hear you cry, "the Sea Devils was just as bad for plot holes and you gave it a 10!"  Yes I did.  That's because the Sea Devils shows us the epitome of what a Jon Pertwee Doctor Who story is.  Lots of chases, moral dilemmas and shouting at Ministers.  This one tries to do the same, but in a far more disjointed way than the Sea Devils or the Silurians ever were.

Lest you think me a total Phillastine though, I did enjoy the trip to Metabilis III, I did enjoy the Benny Hill antics, the maggots looked cool enough even though they were almost totally ineffective, and the Doctor's departure at the end was well acted and tugged at your heart(s) strings.

Rating

6 out of 10

Sorry, but the schizophrenic plot and really bad CSO; coupled with rampant sexism and (regional) ignorance just turn me off this thing

Rewatchability Factor

6 out of 10

Apart from the highlight of the Doctor threatening to "slosh" Captain Yates with a cleaning bucket, and the end scene of Jo leaving, this story has little to invite you back for.

Watch this if you liked...

• The War Machines

• Spearhead from Space

• Doctor Who and the Silurians

• The Mark of the Rani

Consulting the Matrix

Do you think Jo should have gone with Clifford Jones?